Many of us marry when we are in a state of romantic euphoria. This surge of energy we feel around a particular person is that an unknown aspect of ourselves has been projected onto them. This is what generates the remarkable “spark” that gets ignited. The intensity and intoxication we feel are clues that this transference of our own energy has occurred. Because it’s unconscious, we think we are relating to them.
Dr. Carl Jung, world renown psychiatrist explained that what is missing in us will be highly attractive when we see it in someone else and relating is how we get to know ourselves. We all mistakenly believe we know ourselves but what we know is only what we are conscious of which is like the tip of an iceberg. No one knows their whole self. It really is a life-long process to bring unconscious contents to consciousness. He called this the process of individuation — becoming whole and complete.
There really are two lives that we live. One is the first half of life written externally by fate and our environment. The second half of life we write ourselves.
In every relationship, the beginning is when we put our best foot forward for a time but eventually the “new” wears off and we end up in polarized situations with our partner. Our unlived life will be calling us to see it and becomes more intense. This does not necessarily mean it has to be a romantic partner but a romantic partner helps us grow faster as the intimacy is more pronounced. Our friends, our coworkers, our bosses, our siblings can also show us aspects of ourselves that we don’t know yet. Relationship patterns will repeat as we are energy. It is OUR ENERGY that synchronistically attracts to us repeating experiences with others.
The good news is the Piscean Age of sacrifice is over. Staying because of finances, children, our mortgage, our families, whatever is no longer going to be easily maintained. Collectively our evolutionary requirement now is to become conscious.
Our relationship therefore becomes a vehicle for changing our perspective from you complete me to you help me become complete in myself. Our partner helps us see and integrate our unlived life. This is the Aquarian age goal and the most valuable part of a relationship that matures. Are you ready to see your whole self?